Reconciliation
by RonaldAndMione
Summary: Things are a little rocky between Ron and Hermione after his return. Ron is going to fix them.


**Reconciliation**

A quiet calm filled the cold winter air. The tall trees left shadows on the snow-covered ground, making things feel a lot cooler than they already were. Among those trees a girl sat, holding a strange stick-like object that emitted light. The girl was Hermione Granger, and she was guarding the tent that she and her two best friends Harry Potter and Ron Weasley currently inhabited whilst on the run searching for a dark wizard's mysterious sources of life.

Ron stood at the entrance of the tent, watching the girl's back as she sat still and silently outside on the cold ground. He treasured these moments of tranquility and peace; they were so rare these days. He wondered whether this longing from afar would cease – he wished he could be in her presence once more without her giving him a withering glare.

He couldn't blame her though – he was furious with himself, too. He hadn't expected a very warm greeting from either of them – he was very lucky that Harry met him with open arms. Ron turned away from Hermione to look at Harry, who was trying to get some well deserved and needed sleep. He was shaking.

"Bloody hell," Ron muttered, and closed the entrance flap hastily, stepping outside into the cold. He had been letting whatever warmth there was escape by leaving that entrance open. _Poor Harry_. Ron's low self-esteem sank even further. _Blimey, I'm really useless_.

He shivered violently as the cold bit at him. He glanced over at Hermione, who was sitting silently and patiently, a few feet away from him. Ron knew she was wearing three layers of jumpers over a long-sleeve shirt, some warm trousers, a scarf and warm beanie. She was still shivering.

Ron looked back at the tent, and scurried in. He pulled on a jacket, zipped it up all the way, and then grabbed the blanket off his bed. He took a quick look at Harry, and mumbled a heating charm on the tent – it was a real pain to keep doing this, but the charm faded away after awhile.

He came outside once more to see Hermione sitting with her knees pressed up to her chest, and her arms wrapped around her legs. Ron braced himself for the spiteful comment Hermione would fire at him once he let her know of his presence, then walked the remaining distance over to her.

He placed the blanket over her shoulder and back, and lovingly tucked it in the crook of her neck. Hermione turned her neck to look at him, and frowned.

"You looked cold." Ron said simply.

Hermione did not say anything, but turned around to continue her watch. Ron knew there must be something on her mind – she would normally have noticed if someone was approaching her; they had all become annoyingly alert over the past few years.

Ron was freezing, but he wanted to stay with her. He walked around her and sat down beside her. Hermione gave him a sideways glance, but said nothing. They sat in silence together.

"Do you want me to take over?" he finally asked

Hermione shook her head, not looking at him.

"Because I can't sleep, and it makes no sense for us to both be-"

"I'm fine." Hermione said defiantly.

Ron fell silent, and privately hoped she would say something else. When it seemed evident she wouldn't, he continued. "Seen anything worth mentioning?"

"If I had, I would have mentioned it."

Ron gave her a sheepish grin, which she either ignored or didn't notice. "Do you want a cup of tea? I could make us-"

"I'm _fine_." Hermione repeated. She stood up and began walking forward towards the trees. Her lit wand was raised in front of her, and the trees made ghastly shadows against each other.

"Don't think that I think you can't keep watch, Hermione." Ron said, standing up to join her. "You are, you can do anything, you're a strong person." Flattery and compliments wouldn't harm anything, would they? What he was saying was true, anyway.

"Don't think that'll get you in my good books, Ronald." Hermione said angrily. "You think you can just waltz over here, give me a few compliments, and think I'll come running back to you like a dog that's been offered treats? Well guess what, _Ronald_?" she said the word scathingly. "You're wrong, as usual."

Ron frowned at the snide retort. He swallowed nervously. "All I meant was if you need anything I'm here."

"How do I know that, Ron?" she cried, looking over at him and meeting his gaze. "How do I know that you'll be here?" Ron's eyes widened like an innocent child's, though he had never felt guiltier than what he felt at that moment.

He now realised the problem, fully comprehending exactly what troubled Hermione so much – what prevented her from letting him in once more. She was scared. She was afraid he'd leave her once more. She was scared he'd betray her, break his promises. He watched her intently. The brown iris in her eyes sparkled with anger, yet behind that, Ron could see the hurt and fear she had. During the time they'd been apart, she had begun trying to heal herself, and suddenly, he had returned once more, and she was now afraid she'd have to start the process all over again.

_Let it never be said that I have the emotional range of a teaspoon_, Ron thought. Admitting his epiphany, however, would be a terrible idea. It would only make Hermione feel more vulnerable than she already was.

"I just…" he struggled to find some piece of evidence that would help him, show her that he really wasn't going to repeat this.

"Exactly." Hermione said, turning away from him and facing the gloomy forest.

"No!" Ron cried. With that turn, she signified she was giving up on this situation; she was giving up on them. "Please, Hermione, you have to understand, I never meant to leave you! I just, all these emotions, all those things I was feeling, they just took over me, the locket wasn't making things easier, and then, I just couldn't take it anymore and I… walked away." He found it extremely difficult to say the words 'leave you' and 'walk away'. "I just wanted to get away from all the things I was thinking, all those bad thoughts… I never wanted to get away from you."

Hermione looked back at him after he said the last phrase. She looked very vulnerable, but also slightly hopeful. Ron wondered if this was it – maybe today they would finally reconcile, and he would have her back in his life.

"You left," Hermione said in a soft voice, and Ron opened his mouth to help him breathe. His heart was pounding, he was so terrified he would ruin it all. "When things became difficult… you left." Ron hung his head in shame. Hermione's words echoed in his mind. _You left_.

"You weren't the only one suffering." She continued. "I wasn't having a wonderful time – you _knew_ that! Ron, we talked about it, you remember that? We were in the same boat. When we were worried about Harry, we _talked_, when we were having doubts about the locations of the Horcruxes, we _talked_, when we were having fears about this whole mission _we talked_! I _trusted_ you! I _confided_ in you!" At this point, Hermione's voice had risen, but the next words that escaped her mouth were quiet, soft and desperate. "Why couldn't you confide in _me_, Ron? You had to carry that burden all by yourself when I could have comforted you, I could have helped you get over whatever you were feeling!" She stiffened slightly, the way she always did when she was trying not to cry. "I could have stopped you from leaving."

Ron felt pathetic. He glanced up at her through his fringe. "I'm really sorry, Hermione."

Hermione turned away. "That doesn't change much." She walked away from him, going over to a nearby tree and resting her head against the trunk. Ron immediately joined her, and as he approached he could hear sniffs.

"Hermione," he began.

"You left me." She repeated, and Ron saw her hand reach up to her face and rub her eyes. Ron was certain they were now wet. "I had lost so much. I had to give up everything!" her voice began rising. She turned to face him. "I had to give up my education, I had to give up my childhood… I had to give up my _parents_! I lost everything, and you knew that! You _knew_ that! You let me cry all over you when I came to the Burrow – but you _promised_ me!" She pointed an accusatory finger towards him. "You, Harry and your family were all that I had left, but you _promised_ me I'd always have you! We left your family, and we were all by ourselves, I only had you and Harry left… and then _you_ left! You promised me I'd _always_ have you and then you _abandoned_ me!"

Ron had never felt worse in his entire life. Nothing could possibly feel as awful as what he had felt at that moment. He felt that the pain would probably evident on his face, and he hoped Hermione could see just how badly he wanted to fix everything.

"I needed you _so_ much! When you were gone, I had no one. There were nights Harry and I didn't speak, simply because it hurt so much – we were _nothing_ without you, and it felt like you didn't even care, because you had just left us without a second glance!"

"I did care," Ron insisted, taking a step closer to her. "Bloody hell, Hermione, I care about you and Harry so much. Do you know how awful I feel about this? Do you know how badly I wish it never happened?" Before Hermione could retort, Ron continued. "I missed you so much, it hurt – it physically _hurt_, I was so… _lost_, I was nothing without you two too! That's why I came back. You may say you need me, but bloody hell, you have no idea how much _I_ need _you_."

"I felt the same way, too!" Hermione cried, her voice getting higher and more hysterical. "Ron, you were gone, you were always there, but now suddenly you weren't, and you were gone, and oh, _Ron_, I missed you so much, and I'd spend nights just lying awake, thinking of you, wondering if you were alright, if you missed us, if you wanted to come back, if you were looking for us, because those thoughts were all I had left – you were gone, you were completely gone, and I missed you, I missed you so - _oh_!"

Hermione lunged forward into Ron's arms and started sobbing violently. In a split second Ron's long arms were wrapped protectively around Hermione, holding her in place, not letting her go. He would never, _ever_ let her go.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled into her hair as she cried. "I'm so, so sorry." He was apologising for everything he'd ever done to her, anything that had made her hurt. "I'm sorry."

"I know." She sobbed. Ron rubbed her back soothingly. "It's okay."

Ron's heart soared. He tucked her in closer, though he wasn't sure whether it was possible. He held her tightly, almost afraid this was all a dream, and he'd wake up without Hermione once more. She had forgiven him again. He'd been a git to her for so many years, and he'd hurt her so badly this time, and yet she still kept him 'round.

"You're wonderful." He said. "You're the most amazing person I've ever known, and I'm a lousy git, you were right, I'm an arse." He heard a half-sob, half-laugh. "I'm so sorry." He whispered into her hair. "I won't ever stop being sorry." Her soft hands clutched the fabric of his jacket tightly, she clung onto him as if he would disappear. Ron held her head with his hand, keeping it against his chest, so she could hear his heartbeat. "I'm here, and I won't leave you ever again. I promise."

He felt her nod into his chest; she was still sobbing.

"You're going to survive, Hermione." He vowed. "I promise you. You're going to live, you're going to be successful and have a wonderful, safe life. I'm going to protect you until my last breath. I'm not going to let anything happen to you. I swear."

Hermione cried harder.

"I'm so sorry!" he said, kissing the top of her beanie whilst stroking the tips of her hair. "I'm not going to let you go through that again. I promise, I swear, Hermione." He felt tears build up in his own eyes, and he let them fall onto her brown locks. "I'm so sorry for everything I've ever done that hurt you, Hermione. You never deserved any of it." He kissed her head again. "I'm so _sorry_." He whispered the last word, almost in a gasp. He felt her shiver.

He snuck his hand up between Hermione and himself. Hermione pulled back confusedly and Ron saw her face was red and puffy. He kissed her forehead, and she gave him a watery smile. He then pulled the zipper of his jacket down.

"Ron-?" she uttered, but before she could say anything else, Ron had pulled her towards him once more. He then wrapped his jacket around her, and they shared the warmth it provided. Her arms wrapped around his waist, insulated by the jacket and Ron's body.

He tightened his hold on her. "Thank you." He said.

"For what?" she asked, her head not leaving his chest.

"For giving me another chance. I won't let you down. I swear this time I mean it."

He felt Hermione smile. "I believe you."

Ron breathed in – could she get any more amazing? A slight breeze blew by, and he adjusted the hold he had on the ends of the jacket's fabric. "Hermione?" he said.

Hermione lifted her head up slightly, looking at Ron through her shiny brown orbs. "What?" she asked softly.

"Happy New Years Eve." He whispered.

Hermione smiled. "Happy New Years Eve."

Ron grinned as she settled down once more and they embraced in the snow. He looked back towards the tent, and saw Harry looking back at them from the entrance. Harry gave him a small grin and Ron smiled back. He turned his head down to Hermione again, and heard her sigh against him. He reveled in the feeling of her arms around him once more; for so long he had feared he'd never experience the sensation again. Yet she had given him yet another chance, and he was now where he was meant to be – with Hermione.

It was not over yet – certainly not. She had said it's okay, but she wasn't completely certain that something like this wouldn't happen again. She was still scared. It would take a lot for him to gain her full trust once more.

It was alright, though. He wouldn't stop trying. He had time. He had a whole year ahead of him, filled with new possibilities, new hope... he had forever to get her to fully forgive him, because he wasn't leaving her side any time soon.


End file.
